A Deceitful Poison
by clairehart916
Summary: "You both are officially divorced" when a perfect relationship faces the atrocious assault of reality, how will two innocent victims, unconditionally in love, find their way back?a story of overcoming insecurities and finding trust. will it be too late?
1. Chapter 1

**A/N: I do not own twilight. Only the plot belongs to me.**

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**BPOV**

_Tick…_

_Tick…_

_Tick…_

The soft echo of the time slipping farther away and the dull thud of my own dead heart was the only sound my chaotic mind was able to grasp in the colossal room with four wooden chairs occupied by the people who sat there witnessing the carnage and ruthless massacre of my hopes, dreams, love, happiness and life. My eyes repudiated from acknowledging any of the living, breathing examples of personified callousness, finding solace instead in staring out the wrecked glass of the window to admire the busy street and oblivious people chattering and engaging themselves in tedious day to day activities.

_Tick…_

_Tick…_

_Tick…_

My mind tuned out the staid discussion taking place in the room, most probably the discussion which could affect my life in the most devastating way, but I opted to drown out the monotonous muttering in the background anyway. I guess I should be scared at my absolute distraught state. It was as if my world has collapsed, killing every spark of hope and every speck of life with it. I felt dead inside. A numb sensation which was the ramification of constant agony and hopelessness that dominated my heart every second was the only emotion I was capable of recognizing at this horrid time.

Even in the midst of over consuming pain and dead emotions, I could feel his intense gaze from across the table. Still I refused to shift my attention from the scenery outside. I couldn't look at his face. I couldn't look into his inimitable emerald green orbs. Not now. I would fall apart. I would lose the last shred of my carefully crafted composure.

"…And my client is ready to give 50% of his monthly earnings as-" at the insinuation of my soon to be ex-husband's attorney my head snapped to my own attorney, Felix as I gave him a pointed look.

Felix hesitated for a moment, giving me a look of uncertainty, but when he saw my stare turn into a glare, he finally conceded.

"Um, my client refuses to accept any of the money that Mr. Cullen has to offer, so…that won't be a problem. Now, proceeding ahead - "

"Bella…" The soft whisper of his distraught voice interrupted Felix from proceeding further. A shuddering breath escaped me as my eyes shifted to the source of the voice on their own accord. Seeing his shattered form caused my heart to constrict, once again, in intense pain. His eyes were brimming with unshed tears, his hands shaking uncontrollably, his eyes were overshadowed with heavy bags and dark circles due to lack of sleep and his face, the epitome of guilt, shame and unrestricted anguish.

_But no regret…_

There was never a sign of regret, an indication that while he despised the situation we were in, he would not change it. Because for him, I wasn't the most important thing. For him, I wasn't the first priority. While he loved me enough to mourn the loss of the blissful time we spent together, it wasn't enough for him to want me back in his life over the success and dreams he is so desperately seeking.

As soon as that thought tarnished my silent musings, I was once again bombarded with the hideous memory of the fateful night when it all came to an end…

_**~FLASHBACK~**_

"_Stop it Bella! I can't do this anymore. I've explained this to you time and time again, and yet here you are, bringing it up again. I thought you were supposed to support me!" Edward shouted on top of his lungs in the small room of our apartment building. His face was an amalgamation of unconditional fury and pure disgust as his green eyes burned holes in my already wounded soul._

"_What the hell are you talking about?" I spat with equivalent resentment. "I've supported you in every way I possibly can, so stop throwing it in my face. All I want to know is why her? Why the fuck is she so important?"_

"_Seriously? This again? What is your problem with her, Bella? Tanya's my goddamn agent and she's exceptionally good at her job! I need her! She's the reason I have accomplished the little success that I have, and you're asking me to just throw that all away? Only because you can't keep your redundant paranoia to yourself?" he yelled._

_I was seething, my eyes automatically staining with angry tears._

_Why wouldn't he believe me? Why would he trust her more than his wife? I have been witness to the horrendous schemes that her evil mind plots. I have heard her gloat about my husband's intimacy with her. I have listened to her brag about how she will make sure to snatch away my love from me. And yet, Edward remains firm with the fake image he has of her._

_Before I could even form a coherent sentence to rebuke, I saw him shake his head in defeat and anguish as a few tears blemished his unusually pale face._

"_I can't do this. I can't do this anymore. Tanya was right." He murmured almost inaudibly to himself as he flopped down on our bed and dropped his face in his hands, his posture symbolizing defeat._

"_Right about what?" I could hear the dread in my own voice as I asked the question._

"_About you! About us, Bella!" he replied, his voice rising an octave as he looked up at me again. "She was right when she said that our relationship is the main barrier between me and my success. I didn't want to believe her. I fought with her when she suggested that I break up with you. I was so sure I could make it work, __**so**__sure that I could make you see how important this is for me. But look at us. We are constantly fighting, always blaming and hurting each other. This is getting out of hand. I don't even know how to handle this situation anymore. I've tried everything, Bella. Every. Single. Thing. But I'm beyond tired now. I just…I give up."_

_I felt all the color drain out of my face as I stood their shock still, staring in the pain filled eyes of the man who means the world to me. His words stabbed me to the deepest core of my heart and I felt the unrelenting pain tear through my chest as all my pent up emotions came bleeding out of my heart._

"_N-No…" my voice was trembling as I spoke, my face a replica of my annihilated heart. "Don't do this, Edward. This is what she wants. You can't -"_

"_Don't" he whispered, his eyes shutting tightly. "Just don't…I'm sorry…"_

_And with that, he left the room, he left the house…he left me…_

_**END OF FLASHBACK~**_

As soon as I felt my eyes stinging with unwelcomed tears, I snapped my head in the direction of the tattered window pane and tried my best to regain my faux visage of indifference. The proceeding went uninterrupted after that. After months of trial, it was finally coming to an end. Tanya would be ecstatic.

I have been preparing myself for this day from a long time. But the moment those noxious words left Felix's mouth, I realized just how unprepared I actually was…

"Alright, everything has been taken care of…you both are officially divorced now."

It was like a snake had bit into my most tender skin, the sting too hard to bear. Faster than I thought possible, I bolted out of my chair and ran from the nightmarish room and into the busy traffic of New York City. I could hear Edward's agonized cries as he called out my name, following me out of the building, but I didn't stop. Without hesitating or looking back, I started my car and drove away, merging with the common crowd.

The soft tune of my ringtone alerted me to an incoming call. A swift glance at the screen told me it was my friend, Alice. I ignored it. I was in no state to have a conversation with her or with anyone for that matter. I just wanted to be left alone, far away from every living being, in my own pool of embodied misery and cry my heart out. I kept driving, running as far as I can, and finally found myself approaching a small motel just outside of the city. Darkness had engulfed the jovial rays of sun, encapsulating the milieu in its murky veil. My cell was continuously buzzing with calls from the people who cared. I checked the missed calls and noticed Alice, Jasper, Emmett, Jacob and Rosalie's names several times. There were also text messages from each. But one name made my heart skip a beat.

_Edward._

I clicked on Alice's name and send her a quick SMS, assuring her not to worry and that I'll contact her tomorrow. With that I switched off my cell phone and made my way inside the motel. I was sure I looked a complete mess. My suspicion was confirmed when the receptionist gave me a concerned look and asked if I was alright. I just gave a dismissive nod and took the keys to my appointed room.

After locking the door to my suit, I plopped down on the bed and let the concealed emotions pour through me in form of wet droplets of liquid crystals tainting the pillow which supported my heavily aching head.

_He's gone…_

_Forever…_

_He'll be with someone else, probably Tanya. He wouldn't care if it killed me._

_I'm alone…all alone…_

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**A/N: Read and review plz.**


	2. Chapter 2

**A/N: I do not own Twilight. All the characters belong to SM.**

**Thanks to everyone who took time to review. I sent the preview of this chapter to all the reviewers who reviewed and had an account and who have enabled private messaging.**

**To answer some of your questions – **

**I think there will be EPOV in the later chapter but not anytime soon. This is Bella's story. But if a majority of you wish to hear Edward's opinion then I might post another story with just Edward's point of view on individual chapters. That of course depend on how many of you would want that so please mention it in your review.**

**I also wanted you people to have a look at the site mentioned below. It contains previews of my new stories and several fanfiction recommendations and my work. Don't forget to comment and you can even follow me there if you like. I have already posted a prologue of a new story there that I was thinking of working on. Please check it out.**

megliomitali(dot)blogspot(dot)com

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_Ring Ring…_

_Ring Ring…_

_Ring Ring…_

"_Hello, this is Bella Swan. Please leave a message after the beep."_

"_BELLA! Please pick up the phone! Your scaring all of us to death! I swear to God, Isabella Swan, if you don't reply to this message, I'll come barging in your house whether you like it or not….Look, Bella. This is not your pain to suffer alone. Let us all be a part of it. Don't ignore us…I'll be waiting for your response..."_

The apprehensive voice of my best friend, Alice did little to calm the raging war inside my heart. The inexorable burn in my chest was my constant companion since last week. Held inside the dreary four walls of my diminutive apartment as a prisoner of my own emotions and malicious fate was far from the ideal way to deal with this pain and depression, yet I found solace in sitting by the side wall of my room, aware of the paint chipping apart from them, in nothing but a long sleeved white button down shirt that once belonged to Edward. With a bottle of wine in one hand and one of the many scattered photographs in other hand, I sat on the floor and lost myself in the bits and pieces of my once whole life, reminiscing all the good times spent with the love of my life.

I wanted to burn them, believe that it would be a laudable step in moving on with my life. But I couldn't do that. I couldn't bring myself to extricate the only memories left of my once happy past. I couldn't bear to separate myself from the exquisite smile on Edward's blissful face as he smiled up at the camera in his graduation uniform with one of his arms secured possessively around my waist. I could see the unconcealed spark of unadulterated joy in my own eyes as I leaned contently in his embrace in my own graduation uniform, my smile a mirror image of his. The love shining blatantly in the photograph between us was undeniable.

I shook my head and threw the photograph among the scattered pile of the rest of the images and leaned my head against the wall, taking a huge gulp of the rapidly diminishing liquid in the bottle in my hand.

This wasn't helping. The good memories that the pictures were representing did nothing except intensifying the ubiquitous torture on my weary and defeated heart. The wounds on my soul were fresh and I have no idea how long it will take for them to heal, _if _they would ever even heal that is. I had been damaged too brutally, suffered the ultimate blow on my delicate emotions and now I was just a shell of a living organism I once used to be.

My eyes flickered to another picture at my feet. It was the picture from our first date. After a month of stuttering and making silly excuses, Edward had finally found enough courage to ask me out. That was one of the cutest moments of my life. I remembered him being all awkward and nervous when he attempted to ask me out on the date. There was something exceptionally amusing about the most popular guy of the entire high school be so nervous and self-conscious while asking one of the girls from the unpopular part of the crowd out on a date.

I vividly remembered the first time Edward actually noticed me…

_~8 YEARS AGO (Forks High School - senior year)~_

I sighed in relief when the final bell indicating another end to a dreadful high school day rang. I picked up my books and ran from the class room as inconspicuously as I could. The last 55 minutes were undoubtedly categorized among the most dreadful and longest minutes of my life and I was just thankful that it was finally over.

Nope. It was not because I hated the subject. Hell it was English, my _favorite _subject. Yet, I spent more than half of the period watching the clock that hung on the far wall, almost begging it to speed up and announce the end of my misery. The reason of my unusual behavior was my partner with whom I shared my bench today – Edward Cullen.

It wasn't a secret that I had a not-so-subtle crush on the Forks High star, basketball team captain _and _a renowned lead singer of a popular local music band, Edward Cullen. At least it wasn't a secret from my friends who encouraged me by laughing at me and telling me that I'm a dreamer. Yeah, I know…I need better friends, but whatever. The point is that my fragile heart could only take so much when the school king himself decides to choose a seat next to me and ask my usual partner, one of my geek friends Ben, to fuck off and empty the chair for him. Oh no, it wasn't because all of a sudden Mr. perfect had the urge to sit next to the shy and quiet well known geek of the school, Bella. Not at all. In fact it was the person sitting _in front _of our seat that caused him to scare poor Ben away.

I'm talking about the head cheerleader of Forks High, Lauren Malory. Apparently the star couple of our school had a little argument and the blonde princess refused to sit next to Mr. Hottie until he tries to win her back with pretty flowers and expensive fucking gifts. It seems like Forks High's hero wasn't in the mood to empty his pockets and went with the cute old way of playing footsy and flirting with his girl in order to win her back. All the giggling and sweet whispers made me sick and I somehow resisted the urge to gag. The worst of part – he didn't even turn his head enough to notice me! Not that I expected that, but it was an ego killer nonetheless.

After saying my farewell to my friends and making plans for a group study session later in the evening I exited the school. My house wasn't too far from school and I preferred to travel the small distance on foot. While exiting the school, I spotted Edward and his group of friends at a corner. He was laughing at something one of his friends said and I appreciated the way his whole face lit up with humor and carefree mirth. He had his left arm around Lauren's shoulder and she was leaning against him with a possessive manicured hand placed lovingly at his chest.

I sighed and my eyes involuntarily speculated Lauren's immaculate blonde hair, expensive designer dress, appreciative bodily curves and beautiful face. A sudden wave of envy that flowed through me took me by surprise. I looked down at my own comfortable pair of blue jeans and simple brown shirt with disdain. No wonder he doesn't notices me. This is all I am.

A part of me wondered if I dressed in short skirts and tight blouses like Lauren, will it finally help me win a part of Edward Cullen's attention. But I never let that thought proceed. This is who I am and I won't change myself for anyone. Not even Edward Cullen. I might not be an egotistical bitch, but I still loved myself dearly. I respected my principles and treasured my dignity. I might not win Edward's love by being myself but at least I didn't have to deal with losing the love I posses for myself. That is what's most important to me.

I turned my attention back to the road and away from the popular crowd. I was in no hurry to be back at home. Not that anyone would be thrilled to see me early at home anyway. After my parent's divorce and my mother's departure to Phoenix, Arizona – nobody really bothered to pay any attention to my existence. My parents got married at a very young age. They were naïve and hormonal and my mother ended up being knocked up at the tender age of 17. My father had a brilliant idea of doing right by my mother and married her soon after he got the news even though they were clearly not in love. I am aware of what a pain I had been for my mother. She wasn't able to pursue her dreams and fulfill her ambition because she had to take care of me and she never escaped any opportunity to let me know that through subtle comments and angry tantrums every now and then. My father…well let's just say he wasn't doing well with this situation either. We were all a part of a big mess and I knew the day when it will all explode wasn't that far.

My mom had finally had enough of me when I was just 7 years old. She was sick of Forks, of my dad and of taking care of me. She applied for a divorce and my dad ended up winning the custody and taking my full responsibility while my mother left off to live the life she always dreamed about. I don't think my mother even fought for me.

Charlie was a quiet man and barely had time to take care of me. The poor man tried his best but raising a growing teenage girl was not one of his talents. I guess I was just thankful that he gave me a roof to stay and paid for my school even with the little salary of Forks police chief. He never tried to make small talks or tried to develop father-daughter relationship.

Two years later he married a woman 9 years older than him by the name of Sue. She already had two children from her previous marriage. Her daughter, Leah was one year younger than me while her little brother, Seth was 5 year old at the time. As it turned out, Leah hated my guts as well as my fathers. I think she hated everyone in general but my dad and I were her main targets. Her mother was no better. For some insane reason Sue was always paranoid that my Charlie preferred me over her kids which was absolutely ridiculous because as I said, he barely ever acknowledged my existence. Seth was my favorite family member. We grew to me quite close and he considered me more of a sister than Leah (all the more reason for her to hate me). Seth was a cool kid. He was adventurous and funny and absolutely carefree and loving. For some reason he idolized me and always came for my advice and opinions whenever he was in a predicament. He was world's best brother and I never failed to remind him that.

A loud yelling from somewhere far interrupted my silent musings and I looked up in time to see a gangly tall man somewhere in his early 20s grabbing a little kid of about 7 or 8 years old and intimidating him with loud threats – immune to the little child's frightened tears.

Controlled by impulse and unbridled rage I swiftly made my way to the pair in record time. With my vision still clouded with unparalleled fury I snatched the little child away from the grasp of the horrid man and situated myself between the kid and the thug. No, I wasn't a superhero or anything and I was scared shitless at this point, but I couldn't and wouldn't allow a child to be abused like that. Having experienced child abuse myself for a couple of years, I was naturally protective of the defenseless children.

The man looked at me with shock and a hint of panic. A gawky and thin and considering he chose a five year old to be his victim, he was definitely not a criminal I should be worried about.

Being a cop's daughter had made me quite aware of how to handle such situations. Firstly, I quickly wondered my eyes over him to make sure he was devoid of any sort of weapon including guns and knives. After making sure he was harmless in that department, I squared my shoulder and tried to look intimidating or at the very least, unafraid. If worse came to worst, I'll shout at the top of my lungs and attract as much attention as I possibly can to gather help. That was bound to scare the loser away.

The man finally got over his shock and narrowed his eyes on me. He looked tired and hungry and downright miserable. If I didn't hate him, I might have felt pity for the guy.

"Fuck off girl! You've got no business here." The man spat at me angrily.

"And what business may I ask do you have with this little kid?" I questioned in a leveled tone. I would want nothing more than to settle this situation as civilly as possible.

"His father fuckin' owes me some money and I told this fucker to warn his dad to pay me up or I'll beat his spawn into a pulp." He shouted.

"I did tell my dad! He didn't believe me!" the kid sobbed, hiding behind me and holding onto my leg like his life depended on it.

"shhh…its okay." I soothed the child, running my fingers through his hair in a comforting manner and turned back to glare at the man.

He was actually telling me the reason of why he attacked the poor kid and even seemed a little reluctant to hurt the kid himself. He was desperate and hungry but not totally evil.

"How much does his father owe you?" I asked.

The man looked at me with utter shock before composing himself. After a bit of contemplating he said – "$ 1000"

He was clearly lying. I unzipped my bag and took out some money that I carried with me. At least this would feed him for a few days if he's cautious. It was by no means even near to $ 1000 but it will surely get us out of this situation.

I shoved the money into his hands.

"This is all I have and I _know _it is more than what you owed the kid's father. Now, if you ever tried to bother this kid again, I'll make sure that you end up behind bars. My dad is the chief of police. Charlie Swan, search it if you doubt me." I said confidently. The threat works every fucking time.

A moment of fear painted his dark eyes before he recomposed his faux visage and square his shoulders. In a last pathetic attempt to look intimidating, he brought two fingers near his eyes and then pointed it in the direction of the scared little boy. I blocked his path of vision and a growl escaped my throat as I glared at him menacingly. He swallowed hard and finally disappeared in the shadows of the nearby alley.

I let out a sigh of relief and turned to the child who still looked absolutely terrified. I crouched down so that I was at eye level with him and in a gentle tone inquired his name.

"Derek" he informed.

"Well Derek, do you have your dad's phone number?"

The child nodded hesitantly and ranted off the number he seemed to have memorized by heart. I called his father and told him about the situation. His father grew frantic when I told him of what happen but finally relaxed when I told him that his son was alright. I told him from where to pick up and he hung up soon after saying he was on his way.

A grumbling noise made me turn my attention back to the kid and I realized that the noise was coming from his stomach.

"Are you hungry buddy?" I asked and smiled as Derek nodded sheepishly, a light blush coloring his chubby cheeks.

I glanced at the Forks diner that was visible from my spot and was at a walking distance.

"Come on Derek. Let's get you something to eat." I took his little hand and stood up.

I glanced around and noticed that the area was mostly cleared by now. I glanced back towards the school and my breath got caught in my throat momentarily when my eyes fell on the spot where popular gang was gathered a few minutes before.

Some of them had left and only three people, including Lauren, Jessica and Edward remained. Lauren and Jessica were busy chatting among themselves but what made my heart almost halt in its stride was Edward's gaze. It was directed right at me, no doubt having been witness to the scene that took place just a few moments ago. His looked at me with equal parts of shock and curiosity. There was even a hint of awe in his eyes.

I suddenly realized that he had been watching the scene all along and _yet _didn't participate in helping the little kid or at the very least support me.

_Selfish bastard_

The respect I held for him received quite a blow and I narrowed my eyes at him angrily.

He blinked a few times in surprise and looked at me with bewilderment and confusion.

I snapped my face away from him in resentment and partial disgust and turned my back towards him. I felt a little tug on my jeans and looked down at the small child looking at me with wide eyes.

"May I ask what's your name?" asked Derek in a shy voice.

I smiled at him, my anger at Edward instantly melting as I stared at the innocent pair of eyes in front of me.

"My name is Bella sweetie" I replied.

"Will you take me in your arms?" Derek asked, looking at the ground in embarrassment. My smile widened as I held my arms out and crouched next to him. He returned my smile and ran into my arms. I secured him in my embrace and got up to my feet, making my way towards Forks diner.

On the way, we made little talks – me, trying to dissolve the residual of his fear by distracting him with unimportant questions and asking him about his favorite food and color and so on.

We chose a corner table on entering the small diner. I looked at the menu and pursed my lips. I was able to save a few dollars but it still wasn't enough to pay for the food for both of us. So, I decided to buy him a dish he liked and ordered a glass of water for myself.

After making small jokes and finding intense satisfaction in Derek's innocent laughter, I heard the front door of the diner open and saw my own living nightmare walking right from the door.

With her hands tightly wound around Edward's arm, Lauren Mallory sauntered in the room with the grace of a model. But what astonished me the most was that Edward was staring intently right in my direction. I could literally feel his green orbs burning a hole through my soul with their intensity.

I quickly looked away from his eyes, too afraid to drown in their depth. But of course! Out of all the fucking empty table, Edward Cullen _had _to choose the one directly next to me.

_Is he trying to rub his relationship in my face? This day just keeps getting better!_

I tried my best to drown out Lauren's mindless chattering and concentrated on the little angel sitting next to me.

"Bella, you are very nice. You remind me of my mother." Derek confessed, his sweet voice laced with despair and longing.

"Where is your mother sweetheart?" I asked.

"She…well she…she died in a car accident a year ago. I really miss her." He whispered.

My heart twisted painfully in my chest as I saw his heartbroken expression. I composed my features quickly.

"Oh! But I don't understand…haven't you talked to your mother recently?" I questioned, molding my features into one of confusion.

"What?" Derek asked, baffled.

"Don't tell me! You don't know about Guardian Angels?" I asked, pretending to be shocked.

Derek just shook his little head back and forth in utter perplexity but I could see that I had piqued his interest.

I gave him a warm smile before explaining.

"Well you see, when the people we love the most and who love us back equally go to heaven, they kind of request God to send them back to Earth because they don't want to leave their loved ones alone and unprotected. Of course God cannot see his angels sad so he agrees to them and transforms them into Guardian Angels with the mission to go back to Earth and protect and defend their loved ones. If your mother _really _loved you then there is no doubt that she's with you every second. Protecting you and caring for you. Even if you can't see her, she's always listening to you. If she notices that you are in trouble then she sends any form of help she can to protect you. If she hears you making a wish, she tries her best to fulfill it. It might take a long time but she's constantly trying to keep you happy and caring for you as your guardian angel."

Derek was listening to me with unconcealed fascination and escalating enthrallment.

"Tell me, Derek…" I continued. "Did it ever happen to you that you were in some form of trouble and suddenly you got out of it miraculously?"

Derek thought about it for a moment before his face lit up in understanding.

"Yes! Yes! One day, I was searching my entire room for my homework but cannot find it. I even cried because I spent a lot of time completing it. The when I went back to school the next day, I found my homework right there in my bag! That must be my mother! She must have put it there for me!"

"See, I told you." I nodded seriously and then smirked with satisfaction as I saw his face shining with sheer ecstasy and excitement.

"And today when that bad man was about to beat me, my mother sent you to protect me!" By this time Derek was bouncing up and down on his chair, his posture emanating joy.

I smiled and nodded in affirmation of his prediction.

Derek stared at me for a moment and his eyes started brimming with unshed tears. Faster than possible, he bolted out of his chair and crashed his little body into my welcoming arms. I caught him effortlessly and placed him delicately on my laps, running my fingers through his soft blonde hair as he sobbed for his lost mother.

I tried to blink back my own tears but some of them escaped anyways. I felt the pain of the naïve child in my arms longing for his lost mother. I soothed him the best I could, trying to calm him down.

After a while of pouring his heart out, he unclasped his little arms from around my neck and leaned comfortably in my embrace. After finishing the rest of his lunch he spotted his father's car outside and we got up. I paid the bill and we made our way towards the exit.

Before exiting the diner, I glanced at the table where Forks High's star couple was seated. Lauren was still blabbering about God knows what animatedly while Edward's eyes were zeroed directly at me. His face looked slightly dazzled and he was staring at me with an amalgamation of utter bewilderment, shock, an underlying flicker of pain and some other emotion. Edward's biological parents had expired and he resided with his foster parents, so the pain was understandable. But what I was unable to recognize at that point was the other emotion. An emotion which was very close to pure and unadulterated adoration…

A sharp knock on my door startled me from my idyllic reverie. I groaned in frustration.

_Alice!_

I didn't know how much time had passes since I received her last voicemail but now I regretted not replying her instantly. I was in no mood to deal with her right now. I just wanted to be left alone with my memories and emptiness. I didn't have the strength to bear anyone's pity at this point.

I dragged my feet towards the door and slammed it open in one swift movement.

"WHAT?" I spat but stopped myself when I recognized the figure standing in front of me. It wasn't Alice and the expression on my guest's face was definitely not pity. I glanced down at myself and noticed that I was still dressed in nothing but the white button down shirt.

_Oh boy…_

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**A/N: Please review. The reviewers will get a preview of the next chapter before it is released. Reviewers get to play footsy with Edward and flirt with Mr. Hottie :D.**


	3. Chapter 3

**A/N: I do not own twilight. Only the plot belongs to me.**

**I know I had totally disappeared from the face of the earth for a long while but I had my problems…which I won't discuss and bore you to death…instead I want to tell you your messages and reviews were what finally encouraged me to update! So have fun!**

Cropped black hair, slightly tanned skin, strong jaw, well built muscles and dark eyes that were flaring with unbridled fury as they took in my pathetic state. There was no doubt in my mind that the target of the uninhibited rage certainly wasn't me.

"I am going to _kill _that piece of shit Cullen" My little brother Seth spat out from between his gritted teeth as he seethed at my door with crossed arms and a bag slung over his left shoulder.

Seth was studying mechanical engineering at NYU and rented a small apartment not very far away from my house. But with his stressful studies and part time job at a garage owned by an old couple, he was barely ever able to find time to pay a regular visit. We did, however, spent time on weekends where he worked at the same restaurant as me serving tables for extra money.

I let out an exasperated sigh, so not in the mood to deal with him right now. I just wanted to be left alone for a while. "Seth, what are you doing here?"

"You weren't answering your phone" he clipped in a short angry tone.

"Yeah, and there was a reason I wasn't." I shot back. "I just want to be left alone for awhile"

"I've waited a long time for your "awhile" to end. Now I'm takin' the matters in my hands" he declared and pushed past me into my untidy apartment.

Roaming his eyes on the many photos scattered on the floor of the living room, his jaw got hard and the angry emotion in his eyes transformed into downright abhorrence, but he didn't delay in his journey towards my room by giving me a lecture on being pathetic. I followed him inside my room and watched with astonished eyes as he opened my closet and dug out an old duffle bag from the back and started throwing my clothes randomly into it.

"WHAT ARE YOU DOING?" I shrieked in my slightly inebriated state.

"Gettin' you out of this fuckin' prison" was his terse reply.

"Seth, stop it. I don't want to go anywhere. Just leave me alone, I just –

I stopped mid-sentence as Seth turned full force of his fury towards me.

"No, I'm not leaving you alone and you are not spending even a second shedding tears for that piece of crap. I've had enough. Now, you'll either come with me and let me help you live life again and start afresh, or I'm dragging your ass out of here anyway with you screaming and shouting."

I stared at my brother who was two years younger than me and was still behaving like the older big brother whose assistance I required desperately.

He stared back at me with a hard expression marring his face. "So, what is it going to be big sis? Are you coming with me willingly?" he questioned.

I swallowed the sudden force of tears that choked my throat and nodded sincerely, unable to express any emotion with speech.

His eyes gentled and he took my left hand in his right one and gave it a reassuring squeeze. "It's going to be okay, Bella. I promise. You deserve better than this."

His gentle words were the only thread of hope that tied me to the real world for the next few weeks that I spent with him and my friends assisting me back to health and helping me find my way back to happiness with a totally fresh path. Despite everything that happened to me, I was selfishly grateful that all my friends chose to take my side. I would have completely shattered without their help.

But life always had a way of bombarding you with unpredictable surprises...

I was at a bar, seated on a corner booth with my best friends, Alice and Rosalie, having a girls' night out. It had been 8 and a half months since Seth came to my apartment and dragged me away from hell to a comparatively better world. A lot had changed in these months. No, I'm still not completely over my ex-husband but at least now I was doing a good job at hiding it. I wasn't behaving like a zombie anymore. Nor was I alienating myself from my friends who, I realized, _did_ want what was best for me. Their sympathy, love, care and even bitchy comments directed towards Tanya were all I needed to restart my life again.

I had met the girls after finishing my shift at _Reggies_ – the restaurant I work in, serving customers. That job was still the main source of my income but at least things were improving. I finally found inspiration to get on with the novel that I had began writing ages ago – when Edward and I were still together, and was nearly close to finishing it. Rosalie and Alice had both read my draft and were overwhelmed with my progress and the exciting turn the story had taken. They continuously supported me and reassured me that my publisher would love it. I was waiting for this day to end to finally call my publisher, Victoria, and give her my final copy. If everything goes right, I would be immensely close to achieving my lifelong dream and publishing my own book.

As for Edward…well, things weren't totally appalling but they weren't great either. As it turns out, Tanya was right. I _was _a barrier between Edward and his successful music carrier because apparently, just after 5 months after our divorce, Edward made it to the top of the charts with his new release. The name of his new music album was _Untamed _and practically every woman around the globe were driving themselves crazy to get their hands on an album.

It sold billions of copy after just weeks of its release and media was driving themselves in a frenzy to get his personal interview. He was everyone's latest obsession.

Don't get me wrong, I was really happy for him. I even watched all his interviews in his earlier stage of fame. He basically just looked professional and driven during his interviews. Never letting any emotion rather than devotion to his fans, reflect on his face. But his eyes seemed tired and lacked the spark that it once had. I didn't think much of it. It wasn't my place anymore. I wasn't a part of his life. Eventually I gave up watching his interview or even listening to his songs on the radio. Gradually, I shut all things Edward from my life. It didn't help me drain him out of my system but it sure as hell helped me to move on with my life.

Which led me to the present. Having a good banter with my friends and relaxing after a tiring week. This felt good. It was one of the many activities that I had adopted which helped in numbing my mind. It was as close to contentment as I got these days.

"I wanna dance" Alice suddenly announced. I blinked up at her in surprise. Alice's mood swings sometimes gave me a whiplash. A few minutes ago she was whining about Jasper's late hours at work and now she was back to her overly-cheerful self, already bouncing on her heals as if she could project some of her energy towards Rosalie and me.

"I up for it" Rosalie agreed, taking a last sip of her drink and standing up next to Alice.

"Come on Bella! Get up off your lazy bum and help us rock this place." Alice exclaimed.

"No guys. I'm not in the mood right now. Why don't you both go ahead? I'll join you two after a while." I replied.

Alice gave me a disapproving look but knew better than to force me into doing something I wasn't willing. With a defeated sigh she relented – "Fine. But you better be on the dance floor later."

I smiled and nodded and they left me with a quick wave and flying kisses in my direction.

Definitely more than a little drunk.

I was watching them rock the dance floor with their wild moves when suddenly I felt a presence at my side. I looked up to see a tall, well built man with closely cropped, ebony colored hair and violet eyes approach me with a drink in his hand. He was quite attractive and I felt a flutter in my belly that I haven't felt in ages. It was nowhere near as close to the pleasant lurch I felt in my stomach every time I saw Edward even after years of living with him but it still felt good.

He smiled warmly at me and extended his hand. "Hi, my name's Brad. I saw you sitting here from across the bar and finally gathered up the courage to come here and introduce myself" he said in his rich manly voice with a hint of a timid smile curving the edges of his lips.

I returned his smile and took his hand in a firm shake.

"Do you mind if I accompany you for a while?" he asked politely.

"Not at all" I replied after a bit of hesitation. It's been a long time since I had been placed in a situation similar to this. I can't remember a time when there was anyone but Edward sitting on the opposite side of the table from me, smiling at me warmly like Brad was at this particular moment. I didn't want to screw up and let it show how _royally_ messed up I was on the inside.

"Thanks. I appreciate it…" he trailed of pointedly.

"Bella" I filled in the blank for him.

"Bella" he repeated with a smile. "That's an unusually beautiful name."

I automatically blushed at the compliment and gave him a smile. "It's short for Isabella." I explained.

"Well, I like Bella better" he said. "So tell me Bella what brought you here tonight?"

"Just a girls' night out after a hectic week. Best way to take your mind of the crap that life throws at you" I replied and realized I was definitely a little drunk too.

He chuckled. "I know what you're saying. So what made your week hectic?"

And then we started chatting. Minutes changed to hours and we barely noticed. Brad was fun to be with. He was funny and charming and knew how to keep a woman enthralled in a conversation. He worked in construction – the reason for his perfect physique, and came here to spend some time with his friends. "The assholes that left me to dwell alone for the easiest lay they could find". His words not mine.

He told me all about his life and the hilarious stories at his job while I shared a little about my book and the restaurant I worked part time as a waitress. He shocked me by sharing that he had been to that restaurant quite a few times within the last few weeks and had seen me there but never had the courage to ask me out. He said he felt like a stalker but promised that wasn't the only reason he went to that restaurant. He genuinely liked the food there. I laughed and reassured him I didn't think it was stalkerish – even though I was a little flattered but I didn't share that. He relaxed a little after that and freely shared that he couldn't believe his luck when he saw me sitting right across from him tonight and took it as the universe telling him to get his head out of his ass and introduce himself to me. I thought it was very cute.

We were deep in conversation when suddenly there was a loud disturbance at the entry way. We both turned and watched a throng of crowd surrounding the entry way with a few girls screaming with glee and shouts of "Autograph!" and "OhMyGod!" filling the room. I saw the flashes of camera clicking and finally watched as the crowd dispersed – courtesy of the huge security guard shoving people out of the way, and watched with a short, surprised gasp as the two people who seemed to have acquired the attention of the entire bar revealed themselves.

Edward…and…

Tanya.

I felt the bile rise up my throat and took in a deep breath to calm my rapidly beating heart. The bar I was in now was popular but not known to have celebrity visits. I guessed by Edward's lame attempt at hiding behind a tattered baseball cap that it might have been the main reason he chose to come to this bar. He obviously seemed frustrated at being discovered, though how he thought he could go through with the poor attempt to disguise himself as a part of the normal crowd was beyond me. He was trying to hide his aggravated frown behind a forced smile as he apologetically passed his crazy fans that were unlucky enough to not get his autograph and was making his way inside the bar. Tanya on the other hand seemed to be soaking in all the paparazzi and fan circle and smiling widely as she flipped her blonde hair behind her shoulder and put a possessive arm around Edward's.

The bile in my throat became increasingly more difficult to hold back as I saw them make their way inside in a familiar, almost intimate way. I wanted to turn away, I tried to tear my eyes away from the dreadful scene but I couldn't. I was stuck. And all the feelings I tried so hard to bury deep inside me all those months came pouring back.

Edward's head came up and he was scanning for a vacant table when suddenly his eyes hit me.

Time froze.

I watched his expressions relay shock and bewilderment at seeing me there. Then the shock transformed to unbearable pain that flickered through his eyes. Then his eyes caught sight of my companion, Brad, and his expression turned blank. Totally blank. Completely wiped off of every emotion. The only way I even knew that he was a human and not, infact a statue, was when his Adam's apple bobbed as he swallowed thickly as if swallowing a bitter medicine.

We both continued to stare not taking our eyes off of each other. Not moving an inch. Trapped in the weird game that life seemed to be constantly playing with us.

His arm jerked and he turned to see Tanya tugging at his arm. She smiled at him sweetly and started dragging him towards a table a little further from Brad and mine. Edward flicked his eyes towards me while going along with Tanya but I immediately looked away.

I wanted to run. I wanted to escape _so badly._ But I didn't. I didn't want to give Tanya the satisfaction of seeing me hurt like that. And I definitely didn't wanted Edward to have the impression that I cared. I straightened my shoulders and turned my attention completely to Brad, determined beyond anything to not let them ruin my evening. I was going to try to ignore them even if it killed me.

"Wow! Edward Cullen. Who would have thought?" Brad breathed in awe.

I looked at him and arched an eyebrow. "Please tell me you're not going to go beg for his autograph" I said, only half joking.

He laughed and shook his head. "Don't worry sweetheart. No one can be star-strucked enough to ignore the beauty that is sitting next to me."

He smiled flirtily at me. I smiled back at him, pleased that he wasn't a diehard Edward's fan and I won't have to die of embarrassment tonight.

We continued our previous banter and I projected all my energy to ignore the table occupied by Edward and Tanya even though I could feel the intensity of his piercing gaze even at this distance. I didn't turn.

I was immersed in another one of Brad's story about one of his buddy having a lover's tiff with his wife in between the work hours when he said something funny and I couldn't help but throw my head back and laugh.

I heard the shatter of a glass and a girlie shriek and turned to see Tanya rubbing a tissue on her designer dress which was now stained with red liquid and Edward standing to help her, his face carved in stone, his expression unreadable.

"EDWARD! WHAT THE HELL?" Tanya cried, aggravated.

Before I could contemplate the scene before me, a waitress came running by and started wiping the liquid while another waitress picked the pieces of the shattered glass.

I saw Tanya turn towards me and narrow her eyes in a loath-filled glare. I had no idea why Edward dropping his drink had anything to do with me. But then again, this was Tanya. She could make anything wrong in her perfect life about people she didn't like. After glaring at me for a good while, she turned and stormed away towards the washroom at the far back of the bar.

"Hey, would you like to join me for a dance?" Brad requested and my eyes turned to him.

I smiled apologetically at him and said, "Sorry, I'm not in the mood today."

"C'mon, just one dance. I promise you'll have a good time" he pleaded and I bit my lips in contemplation. After a few moments I gave in and let him lead me to the dance floor.

I always lost myself when I danced. It was one of the things Edward used to love about me. I always let the wild side of me take over and let my mind forget for a moment who I was and where I was when I danced. Instead I blanked my mind and moved with the rhythm, dancing to the beats feeling the music.

This time was no different. I moved my limbs and hips to the music, closed my eyes and lost myself in the beat of the song. I felt Brad's arms encircle me from behind and felt his lips kiss and caress me behind my ear. As I lost myself in the music I let my control slip from my mind and imagined they were Edward's arms and his lips instead of Brad's. I knew it was all sorts of wrong but in that moment, it didn't matter. I lifted my own arms and put one on his forearm wrapped possessively around my waist and stretched my other arm behind me to intertwine in his soft hair. I dropped my head back, resting it on his shoulder and enjoyed the little moment in my perfect-Bella fantasy.

Suddenly, I was yanked out of my fantasy and dragged back to the real world when I heard a voice say firmly from beside me –

"Do you mind if I cut in?"

I opened my eyes in astonishment and saw Edward standing there, his arms already reaching out for me.

"I'm not sure – " Brad began but Edward didn't pay any attention to him. He pulled me in his arms and twirled-dragged me across the dance floor, away from Brad.

I was too shell-shocked to even contemplate his behavior. I couldn't believe this was happening.

When he had me in a secure little corner on the dance floor, he turned me to face him and locked his arms around me. He dragged me towards him and just held me for awhile, taking a deep breath, as if it was the first breath he had taken in ages. Slowly and slowly, he started swaying with the music, bringing my body closer in the process. Close. Too close.

I broke through my shocked haze and put my arms on his shoulder, applying pressure to push him back.

When he didn't budge, I increased the pressure and stated in a warning tone, "Edward…"

"Please" he cut me off with his urgent, almost desperate whisper. He closed his eyes shut tightly and pulled me even closer to him so that my front was plastered to his muscled chest. He rested his forehead against mine and repeated on a pleading whisper – "Please"

I froze in absolute shock at the pain and loneliness I heard in his voice. His expression was molded in one of extreme anguish and his hold on me was suffocatingly tight. It was the hold of a drowning man holding on the last straw to prevent himself from sinking.

"Edward" I whispered, the pull of my hands on his shoulders vanishing.

Before Edward could react, a lanky teenage boy flashed his camera at us and I blinked at the sudden intrusion.

"Man! This is going to earn me good money!" the boy shouted with glee.

I saw Edward's body turn to ice as his eyes cut to the boy in front of us. His expression was fierce and his voice cold when he demanded, "Give me the camera"

"What, are you crazy? No way dude!" he replied.

Edward clenched his teeth in an obvious attempt to stop himself from harming the boy and said, "I'll pay you twice the amount you'll otherwise get on that snap. She had nothing to do with this. Leave her out. You can click as many photos of me as you want, no one will stop you and I won't protest. Just delete the photo you clicked of her."

The boy contemplated this offer for a while then replied, "Nah! I'm gonna keep this. Sorry, dude!" and with that he disappeared out of the bar, practically running away.

Edward let out an aggravated breath and turned apologetically to me.

"I'm sorry, Bella…I didn't mean – " he started but I cut him off.

"Don't! Please Edward just…just don't"

Then I turned and half walked half ran towards my table where Rosalie and Alice were already standing with my purse and jacket, their faces filled with anxiousness.

"I'm so sorry, Bella. I had no idea – " Alice began but again I interrupted.

"No need to apologize, Alice. You couldn't have known. Let's just get out of here"

With that we made our way out of the bar and in the taxi that was thankfully there when we came out and drove away. Away from Brad, away from Tanya, away from another drama…and away from Edward. Except this time…it was me who left him.

**A/N: PLEASE REVIEW!**


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